sounds like a different type.

i dont know all the types, but lou pagets book "the big o" is supposed to explain them.

I know someone that orgasms the EXACT same way... it's not as unusual as you think, just a different thing for different people

i totally hear you. i do the exact same thing!! i've been doing it since i was nine or ten. ok, works when i'm that age. um, now that i'm in get-down mode, my appreciation for those types of orgasms has waned.

i've had three occasions in my life where i've orgasmed w/out that situation; every other one i was in the same position, lying on the same side, everything.

nice to know someone else has experienced it.

I masturbate almost the same way. I also haven't orgasmed during sex unless I masturbate also. Here's a couple of good positions to try if your man is open to it- then you can play with yourself and learn to come during sex and maybe that will help you to transition to orgasming without the use of the hand.

1) He lays on his back. You straddle his legs facing his feet and have him enter you. Then you slowly lie back on his body and stretch your legs out in front of you. You will be fully laying all the way on top of him.

2) He lays on his right side. You lay at a 90 degree angle to him on your back (facing him), then put both of your legs up over both of his legs and you can "sit" down on him to have him enter you. Then you can stretch your legs out in front of you. He may have to angle himself kind of sideways to keep in you, but he'll figure it out real fast.

I'd guess that your orgasms are less g-spot oriented and more from clitoral stimulation. Many women can cross their legs, swing their feet and feel the sensation on their clits. Some can achieve orgasm this way.

Are you directly stimulating your clitoris during intercourse? If not, that's probably the reason you don't get the same response as you do when masturbating. There's no direct stimulation on your clit so you can't reach climax and release.

It sounds to me like you are orgasming with your man, it's just not a typical clitoral orgasm. Of course I am a man, so take this with a grain of salt, but your description of how sex goes for you sounds like how women have described G-spot/Vaginal Orgasms to me.

I think a lot of other people have replied to your post with advice on achieving clitoral or blended orgasms during, and that all of this is better than I could give you, because, as I've already mentioned, I don't own a vagina.

That said, your ability to enjoy a quivering, ethereal, pulsating experience during and after sex, without a conventional orgasm makes me think of some advice I can offer your man: Get into taoist sex practices! Both of you can have a less "beginning and end" experience. There is a Taoist Sex tribe that I would recomend to any man, but particularly to a man who's with a woman with your kind of response. In my experience, what you're describing is very compatible with Taoist Sex, and if you get into it, all that quivering, ethereal, pulsating will probably become much more intense... who knows, it might even push you over the edge in other ways.

>"I intertwine my legs while lying down, then squeeze my legs tightly together."

By the way, you can discover sex positions that would allow you to do the same thing, with your partner.

Every tried HIS legs straddling you, your legs crossed and squeezed together, with him in you? He'll get quite a sensation too. Explore... and practice, practice, practice. =)

the learned response has been an issue for me, mostly from an expectation perspective. my orgasms while masturbating are the clitoral type and very powerful. i learned this sensation and equated it with what orgasms are supposed to feel like, not knowing the vaginal orgasm existed. with these kinds of orgasms i am very sensitive afterward and am ... done.

during sex i became frustrated and anxious because i couldn't achieve THAT feeling, even less so when my man was trying hard to get me there (feelings of failure on my part prevented the go-with-the-flow enjoyment and natural progression). i have come to realize that if i have no expectation of orgasm, i actually get much closer to coming much faster. and that is something that is hard to do on purpose, by definition.

i have also come to realize that my body actually can achieve orgasm during sex, but that the orgasm feels very different (less focused and more whole-body). i wasn't equating this feeling with orgasm because it didn't feel like what i had learned, but the euphoria and release was unmistakable. after these kinds of orgasm, i just want more. more contact, more penetration, more everything. these are the wavy kind you are all talking about, i think, and i can get to a state of continual shuddering. after a while it can be overwhelming and i need to be calmed down slowly because i am vibrating like a wire under tension.

i spent a good part of my sexually active life feeling disappointed that this second kind of orgasm wasn't the real thing, wasn't good enough ... in effect turning that beautiful sensation into a negative thing and increasing my disappointment with myself.

my advice ... just enjoy what you have and don't try to get anywhere in particular. DO explore and play and learn yourself, but DON'T think that your responses aren't up to standard. oftentimes our brains set standards that are just impossible to achieve.